Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Happy Birthday, Pebbles

Today is Pebbles' 25th. I had pre-show dinner with she and Guy and I'm going to have to try harder to remain neutral on him. I've always thought that he was good for her, but after last night, I can't say that I'm sure of that any longer. And it was nothing overt, nothing egregeious he said or did, but rather what he didn't say and what he didn't do.

I know that they/she are going through some adjustments to finally, formally living together. He's never had a live-in (red flag?), and so I know that it's been a while since he's shared his space with anyone and I know personally that it's an adjustment. It's just that he seemed so negative about everything - the house, the neighbors, the neighborhood, the grocery stores, just damn near everything, and like it was everyone else's fault that things in the O.C. aren't like they were in Austin. What was running in the back of my mind was that these people, things, neighbors, neighborhood, grocery stores were HERE when you chose to move in. If you are unhappy, then you made a series of bad choices. You bought in a neighborhood that doesn't make you happy and then you chose to overbuild and then the contractor you chose was bad and now you are left with a half-finished addition in an ethnically diverse neighborhood with neighbors you can't seem to stand. And I learned all of this in about ten minutes.

And then there's Pebbles. She appears to be having a quarter-life crisis (Pebble's crisis/drama/discontent happens with regularity, so I'm used to those) and she's gaining some weight and seems to be sort of unhappy. She wanted some new clothes, so I took her shopping for her birthday. She chose to wear one of her new dresses (that I picked out but had already told me that Guy doesn't like) and his response when she appeared ready to leave for the show - "Oh, you are wearing that?"

Mom-mode came over me like the Incredible Hulk and before I knew it, I was saying, "Guy, I think the appropriate response is, Pebbles, you look nice." I really don't have any ego in the dress choice - she wouldn't have selected it from the eleventy-billion things she tried on if she didn't like it, but goddamn, I wanted to maim the arrogant motherfucker. This does not bode well.

And I'm aware of the irony of this situation - I'm living with Bick, whom by all accounts, neither my Mother nor sister likes very much. They really just don't get me/us/the relationship. But Bick is kind and supportive and I am beginning to wonder if Guy is. And I also wonder what, if anything, I should do with these thoughts?

Take good care of yourself. Be kind to others. Be good for others.


1 comment:

  1. My mom never really liked Mark back when we were dating... I knew it too. It made it difficult, as I had myself convinced she "just didn't know him like I knew him." Turns out she was right! He was an immature cad. It's a no win - expressing your thoughts. I had to find out on my own. Good thing about her though was she was always there for me when I came a crying, and never judged me when I went back for more.

    I had to go through the pain... Our story is unique in that 10 years later, by then, the feelings were still there and we both had grown out of our immature stages. I wish she had been around to meet the new and improved version of him.


We'll try this for a while.