Friday, July 31, 2009

Scenes From A Marriage

Yesterday went well. The cousins' visit was pleasant. Both the mother and daughter were very nice. However, the visit left me feeling a bit sad for all concerned. While nothing was overt and no one appeared bitter or even aware of what was being shown, it appeared to me that this couple have become parents to their children and not much to each other.

They live in the town that was evacuated yesterday. Their home and business are in the target area. The mother was worried about her dogs that were left at home and all conversations to the dad were funneled through the daughter. Very odd dynamic.

They are a successful family - business is good, both children are healthy, smart and accomplished, the older son being away at college already, and I got the sinking feeling that this was a union in trouble. What will happen when the youngest goes to school next fall? I don't know, but it doesn't look good from where I stood. I wish them well as they navigate these uncharted waters.

I'm still rebalancing after two restaurant meals yesterday. I did walk so much that I got a blister, but I think that's more about shoes than exercise. So today it's back into my grove - clean, healthy eating and some exercise. I'm thinking of a spin class today. We'll see.

Take good care of yourself. Be kind to others. Give all your relationships some attention.



  1. Changing family dynamics can certainly put new stresses on a marriage. Hope they can navigate through the choppy waters.

    Anyway, you've done your good deed for the week (damn, I was gonna ask you to wash my car)...

  2. Although I think there's something noble about "staying together for the kids", it does make you wonder how things will end up once the kids move on. Good intentions aren't always enough to sustain a relationship. Hope they make it through. Who knows, maybe they'll find they actually like each other when some of the responsibility goes away :)

  3. I feel that this is so common in marriages these days. The kids become the focus and parents don't focus on themselves as a couple during this time.
    I hope things work out

    Enjoy your spin class!

  4. The family that I work for are a very interesting. I am an outsider looking in at their "tribe" They are truly a study in anthropogy. I get to observe 4 generations all at once. Get to....I am really trying to be positive

    I don't have much to say about a successful marriage or S.O. relationship.....never had one.

    I do think that this feeling that the kids come 1st isn't the right order of things. The marriage is the most important thing. Kids need to see that realtionship modeled.

    Spin away!

  5. Oh, Roxie - I always enjoy reading your post and the comments. And thanks for all the comments over on my post...


We'll try this for a while.