Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Keeping The Focus

I'm facing some financial decisions that cause me some fear and anxiety. It's nothing bad, it's just having to act like a grown-up and deal with adult things, including money. Turns out, dealing with money issues causes me discomfort. I've realized that I have some guilt and some fear and some shame all rolled up into my money issues. Lordy, am I a mess or what? No, I'm not a mess really. I'm finally seeing, feeling and attempting to deal with some of my "stuff" and sometimes it's not the most fun thing in the world, but it's so very necessary. The rewards are enormous. So I've just got to pull up my big-girl britches and get it done.

So have I been doing all my other really good self-care practices that I KNOW help me deal with stressors from a better place? NO. Have I been meditating? NO. Have I been practicing yoga? NO. I have I even taken a few minutes to practice some deep breathing? NO. I don't know why I let these things slip when I have proven to myself over and over again how much better I feel when I'm better able to stay in the present moment and not wander all over creation with my worried thoughts. Keeping my focus small lets me live a big life. It's a million little pieces that keep the big picture together.

I got a wonderful night's rest and do feel much better today. I've got a few financial tasks (see above) to take care of today and then I need to just let this go. I cannot control the outcome and worrying about it won't change a thing. I'll do my best and that will just have to be good enough. Let it go. Let it be.


Take good care of yourself. Be kind to others. Keep your focus.

-Roxie

9 comments:

  1. I hate money problems. Had to put on my big girl britches a couple of weeks ago. I should learn how to just keep 'em on..lol

    I think sometimes, ok most of the time, I will wallow in the worry because on some level "TCB" tells me this is how I am going to control the situation. Insert laugh here!

    Glad you got a good night's sleep. That helps out ALOT!

    May your money issues work out the way you hope.

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  2. Maybe you should talk to my financial advisor. Actually, since his advice usually involves buying more lottery tickets, maybe you shouldn't talk to my finacial advisor.

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  3. LOL, like the lottery ticket idea!

    Hate dealing with real issues like money too - ugh!

    Hope you can enjoy nice things now!

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  4. I'm the same with money - we live so close to the edge, finance-wise, that anything unexpected throws me into a panic. I hate that about myself...we always get through it, but still, those feelings are there. Hope your issues are resolved quickly and painlessly!

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  5. I'm pretty sure there was a Pinkie Swear contract in effect ... :D
    I've slipped too. So easy to glide right back in to "safe" habits ... what a joke they are.
    Practice, practice, practice.
    Thanks as always, Roxie, for sharing the slippages as well as the victories. We can all learn from each other that way.
    You are the best!
    xo

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  6. Money problems aren't fun, no matter how trival or serious. It seems we have dealt with them in some form or another since our marriage.

    I hope it all gets better soon!

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  7. Money sucks :-(
    I'm one of those terribly un-modern women who lets the husband deal with it (not that he'd do anything major without discussions mind you - he makes me act like a grown-up when it counts). And I buy lottery tickets too, but so far they haven't solved any problems for me.

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  8. NYT.com has an interesting article on stress.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/18/science/18angier.html?em

    Brain is a Co-conspirator in a vicious stress loop.

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  9. That's why you are doing well... you actually make your way out... not fake your way out. Even without yoga!

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We'll try this for a while.