Thursday, December 10, 2009

Lemony Persnicket(y)

Just two days until the family luncheon, one hellish week at work and then it's off to Puerto Rico for the actual ceremony. I finally went out and bought a travel guide and road map yesterday. I have planned nothing for those eight days. Those who know me, know that I usually approach travel with a overflowing folder full of information and a pretty detailed itinerary. I don't know that I will have time to do that for this trip.

I'm also rethinking that whole strategy anyway. Isn't it really an attempt to control things in some ways? Probably. I do believe that without some sort of plan, you do miss out, but I think I need this to be rather "chill" no matter who is on the trip. I know I will have to chill if I plan on doing or seeing anything with Pebbles and Slater, as Pebbles is the WORST TRAVELER EVER! Obviously, our styles are a bit different. She knows nothing of time, itineraries and travel plans and just wanders around by the seat of her pants. I seem to recall an afternoon in Rome that had me in tears at the time. It's pretty funny now, but it was not then. I do not want a repeat of that. There's got to be some middle ground, I think.

Got up and hit the gym for a bit of a run this morning. It felt good. I'm thinking I might want to start up again. The Closet is right across the street from a running store that holds group training sessions for upcoming runs. I may check it out. I'm also very close to some really good running trails. This may be the time to get back into this. I do enjoy the "boost" I get when I'm sticking with an exercise routine that challenges me. I want to take advantage of all my options here at The Closet Retreat. Seriously, I've begun to think of this time as a year long retreat where I try my best to live mindfully, to treat myself well, which includes plenty of rest, good for me foods, and exercise, along with my spiritual practice. If I've got the lemons, I might as well make the lemonade.

And in other nuptual news, I did manage to decorate the favor boxes last night. Boy, was that an eye-opening experience for me. I really became aware of how tense the whole process made me and how much weight I was putting on the outcome of decorating some stupid pasteboard boxes. I fussed and fumed around with them and finally just had to let it go. They do not matter. At all. Why do I let myself get so worked up over silly things like this? Too much money and too much emotional energy for very little ROI. I am hopeful that is a lessoned learned. Hell, I know it's not a lesson learned yet - I'm still in the recognizing this as a habit/tendency stage. It'll be a while before I get good enough to recognize this BEFORE I get enthralled. But overall, given that this is a wedding, I've done pretty darn well at keeping it low-key.

The thing I loved about yesterday
was the cookie I didn't like. Here's the deal - I went to the bookstore with a co-worker yesterday to pick up a travel guide. There is a fancy-pants bakery right next door to the bookstore, so we decided to drop in for a little treat. Now I am not anti-treat when there is built in portion control. I was going in for a small something and I was going to savor and enjoy every morsel. I chose a lemon cookie sandwich. We didn't eat them there, but instead, chose to bring them back to the office. As we were walking back into the office, I told my co-worker that I really wasn't hungry that I was actually more thirsty and that I wished I'd recognized that fact before buying the cookie. But did that stop me from eating it? No. I did, however, take two bites of the cookie, decided I didn't love it and I threw the rest in the trash. In the past, it wouldn't have mattered if I liked it or not, I'd have eaten it all. But I didn't love this cookie and so I didn't finish it. I can't say that I've ever done that.

Take good care of yourself. Be kind to others. If it's an indulgence, make it worth it.



  1. Well done you on the cookie front! I struggle with not eating things I don't love - I stop if I don't like at all, but otherwise tend to feel as if I should finish it even if I don't love it. Such a waste of calories!
    I envy everything you're saying about the Closet! Can I come and live with you??? Awww, pleeeeeze!!!! Its so cold and horrible here...
    I usually don't plan too much for holidays unless I'm going on a cruise, when you only have 1 day per country / island / port you have to plan ahead and I usually have all the trips planned, booked, and paid for before I get anywhere near the ship. Otherwise I only bother if there's an absolute 'can't miss, my life will be blighted if I don't do this' event / place / tour on. With everything else going on in your life it does sound like you've earned some relaxation, so whatever makes you feel the most chilled is the best way I'd say. I'm sure its going to be a great break however you play it! I have been to PR on a couple of cruises, but I've only really seen the inside of a couple of posh hotels (waiting for flights home) and done one rain forest tour, which was great.

  2. I so agree with you on the cookie deal. If you don't LOVE it why eat it! I think thats a good way to live.
    I too can get so wrapped up in making something PERFECT (or perfect to my eye) that it takes away from the whole experience. Ofcourse i only recognize this in myself halfway thru...arrrgghh!
    Love your idea of pursuing running again. Just remember its suppose to be fun! Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Thats when i tend to quit things. When i give them too much importance. The world will not explode if i don't go out there and give 110% EVERY time i run. Just the fact i got my lazy butt out there is a victory! JInx! Be thinking about ya!

  3. I really love how you are embracing all the changes - your attitude is really terrific about all of this.

    I think it's hard to find a traveling companion whose style can mesh with yours - good to know ahead of time that you and Pebbles are different and I like that you are taking steps to make the trip work for you. It will all come together, I'm sure.

    All this talk about a running store/group has me excited for you - this could be really great!

  4. I'm an eensy bit jealous of your running store group. I loved the running group that used to be around here - sponsored by the local hospital. Then they disbanded it and now the closest group is an hour away for me. Every time I think about going I also think by the time I drive there and back I'd have a really long run done. It's awesome how you are thinking about the Closet and the year ahead. Makes me feel hopeful on your behalf!

  5. yup, I realized that before starting to lose weight.
    I grabbed a small cupcake, took a bite and the first thought to hit my brainstem was "yuck, it tastes like cardboard". The second was open mouth, eject it...
    and I did, into the garbage.
    Somethings aren't even worth the calories of one bite lol.
    Have fun in puerto rico.

  6. Say whaaat..? A cookie in the trash, I've not ever heard of such a thing. Wow, I must try this.

    Will we get to see the boxes... I know exactly what you mean about getting all perfection-ey when it comes to stuff like that. I'm exactly the same way. It's nice when you're doing it for someone else to care that it looks nice, but to get all in a flux about it, just ain't right. People will LOVE them, and I only wish I could let you know in person how delightful they are.

    I am so happy for your "year retreat." What an adventure!! You're doing great!

  7. You are doing just amazing considering how much you're going through right now. I'm inspired by your strength in all areas.

    Great job on that cookie. I would eaten the whole thing. I hope to be more you someday. In many ways.

  8. You are doing just amazing considering how much you're going through right now. I'm inspired by your strength in all areas.

    Great job on that cookie. I would eaten the whole thing. I hope to be more you someday. In many ways.


We'll try this for a while.