I've had a really short fuse lately. I've been quick to anger and while I haven't acted out in horribly inappropriate ways, it's important for me to note and to try to figure out what's triggering (ha!) it.
I can recall three incidents just within the last ten days or so where my temper/anger flared and I reacted in a way that I am not pleased with.
1. On the rafting trip, I let the chip on the guide's shoulder become mine.
2. Yesterday, I said something to the couple buying a week's worth of groceries while in the ten item or less express line. Wasn't my job.
3. Walked out of the gym at lunch. I forgot to take my ID and the new people were probably just following orders. I just said "Forget it" and left.
When I start being quick to anger, it's usually a sign that something is going on. People have commented that I sound mad and angry on the phone/messages when I'm not even aware of it. I'm carrying all sorts of tension around in my face - constantly with the pursed lips. I've been doing all the things that I know to do to combat this: getting exercise, getting rest, deep breathing/meditation, journaling, etc. but I just can't seem to shake it. As I told Diana in a comment on her blog, I feel like I am in Funkville. Or more accurately, PissyMoodVille.
Interestingly enough - the thing that really appeals to me right this very second is hopping in the pool. I'm not a swimmer, so that it's it. Wonder if the water serves as some sort of sensory-deprivation thing? Who knows?
I thought that surviving last week would change how I'm feeling, but I guess not.
Had a nice day with Bick yesterday. He came into town and we grabbed a burger a new place. I didn't really pay attention to what I was ordering and it was a huge, double patty outfit. And while the bleu cheese and bacon sounded good, the cheese really overpowered everything. Next time, just a burger.
We followed up lunch with a trip to the museum to see the abstract exhibit. I really enjoyed it, while Bick preferred the Adams' photography exhibit. The real fun began when we took in a local antique mall. I got a framed print for my apartment and Bick got a piece of music memorabilia, suitable for framing.
Take good care of yourself. Be kind to others. Pay attention.