Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Finding The Path

You guys are pretty darned smart. I'm feeling much better. Still sleeping soundly and haven't had another episode of "jet-lag head" TM Helen. And I'm gently nudging myself back to the path of righteousness. I don't respond well to restricting and using exercise as punishment, so I'll fall back to my old faithfuls - things that bring about an easing back into the good stuff. First, I don't restrict how much I eat, only what I eat. I go back to eating clean (for me) and the quantity will take care of itself. And while my motivation to sweat has temporarily (I hope) left me, I've now put my car keys back up. It's time to walk around again. I'd gotten away from that, as the past month pre-trip had been hectic and I'd been trying to get home as early as possible to be able to get in a bike ride. Well, right now it's 1. rainy or 2. I have evening plans or 3. time change makes weekday evening rides impossible and 4. I've been having some pretty severe neck and shoulder pain if I ride for more than an hour. So I'm back on the bus.

Being "on the ground" goes a long way in getting me grounded and living in the moment and not flying off into thinking about the next thing and disregarding THIS moment. I did not really want to go to the gym at The Closet last night, but I did the "twenty minute" promise to myself. I stayed for a half an hour. As my motivation wanes, I try to find a place to hold on (walking more, more shorter trips to the gym, etc) and not lose too much ground until the mojo strikes again. Today will bring a lunchtime trip to the gym - for what, I have yet to decide. This evening brings an opportunity to catch up with the lovely Erica, who is in town visiting family.

Rest of the week is sort of up in the air. Bick's Mom is failing and he has been traveling down to be with her/his sisters regularly. So we are sort of in a holding pattern there. I may or may not have the dog.

And for Ellen, who writes beautifully about moving outside of one's comfort zone, I will be making calls to contractors to set up round two of estimates. I've effectively done everything else INSTEAD of this, including cleaning up both my office and my work to-do list. My calendar is clear - I can and should do this today. I post this for accountability, as what I really want to do is avoid this and all the stuff that surrounds it.

I also have something to ponder. Bick and I get along famously. Rarely does he become a burr under my saddle, but pre-trip he pissed me right off. And while I'd like to be both pissed and right, I have to consider the fact that he might well have a point. I was having a panic about the whole currency issue. And during a phone call, he had the nerve to say to me, just before I suddenly "had to let him go" (as to not be accused of hanging up on him - because I'm all mature like that) he said "Well, you always have to have something to worry about, I guess this is as good a thing as any." So while I feel I've turned the volume way down on my Drama Queen, apparently she, like Cher, makes many, many farewell appearances.

Take good care of yourself. Be kind to others. Find your path.

-Roxie
139.5

9 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. I'm glad you're getting back to being you. Jet lag is a terrible thing and caused you to play head tricks on yourself (you..not eating right and not wanting to exercise is NOT you).

    Love the simile of your drama queen being like Cher. Many farewells. Too funny!

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  3. I think my drama queen might be related to yours.

    I can see in this post that you are already clearing your head. You gotta have more faith in yourself Roxie!

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  4. Seeing a tech at a bike shop for a fit is a good idea. They'll take a few measurements on you, size up Cha-Cha and make adjustments, if possible.

    I may never know when that post was actually published. I'm happy enough that it was posted. The fact that there is no email generated to tell you so is minor. I could always set up a little test to find out.

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  5. I love your wisdom and your point of view. Patient progress and a deep knowledge that you're on solid ground.

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  6. I'm going to call out of bounds on Bick's comment.

    The currency thing was a legitimate problem. It wasn't his problem and maybe he was sick of hearing about it; however, it was a real problem for you. Being dismissive of legit problems isn't helpful. At all.

    You weren't being a drama queen. You were stressed out by the lack of ATM access in a foreign country where most of the transactions are cash based.

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  7. I've got a drama queen that visits from time to time. Have to beat her into submission now and again.

    Glad your head is settling a bit into day to day stuff.

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  8. I like what Christine said. Your allowed to get upset over something like that. Though it's nice to see my part in things, sometimes I can over board and make it all my fault. Not that you did that. It's just something I try to watch out for. The hanging up thing is totally my M.O. Just ask anyone who has pissed me off over the phone. i alwasy feel like an ass when I have to go back an apologize. It's never the right thing to do.

    Thanks for your example. You get (or wait around for ) your mojo to come back in a sane way. That was advice you gave me along time ago and it's the best advice I have gotten over the course of this journey.

    Hugs and THANKS again!

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  9. I think I have to agree with Christine on this one, Roxie. And I think you are taking the high road as well for considering the possibility that you may have over reacted (which again, I don't think you did. I would have freaked out at the currency thing, myself).
    Glad to hear that you're still sleeping well. At least you've got your groove-on in that area, and let's hope it stays; you'll just feel better and better with good sleeping habits.
    ...and thank you so much for mentioning me in your post. You've got me rooting in your corner, Roxie! Knock this contractor mess right out of the park!! LOL

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We'll try this for a while.