Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Restricting and Inflicting

I've had a bit of an issue getting back "on track". And it's not like I've been on some food bender over the holidays, but I have over-indulged on those things that don't make their way into my regular way of eating. And while I had every good intention of getting back in the groove on Monday, a combination of being exhausted and an unfortunate trip through Food Pusher Alley (the office kitchen) brought me face to face with homemade peanut brittle. Not a pretty sight.

So yesterday was a reboot day for me. And I'm making note of the things I do and the things I don't do to nudge myself into my life of good clean living.

Getting enough sleep is job one. When I am tired, I am susceptible to all sorts of whims. I'm also fighting biology. My body is looking for a quick energy boost to power me throughout the day.

I don't restrict. I have a history of a diordered relationship with food. When I try to restrict or "make up for" less-than-stellar choices, it usually always backfires. Introducing perfectionism never helped me. And while I don't restrict the quantity of food, I will make choices to eat good clean protein and plenty of it. I tell myself I can have as much as I want. Last night I had two grilled chicken breasts. Good clean protein sources help me back on the straight and narrow.

I don't inflict. There's a temptation for me to "get back to the gym" to try to make up for my behavior or in my case, punish myself. I no longer inflict punishment in the form of excessive exercise. While other people practice intuitive eating, I practice intuitive exercise. My body will crave exercise and I will give it what it wants. I always want to view exercise as an act of lovingkindness because I am worth taking care of and not as a way of "whipping myself into shape". Yes I enjoy exercise, I enjoy being fit and healthy, but if I do too much, then I might get to the place where I place my value on my accomplishments, not on who I am. I don't want to get into a performance based system to determine self-worth. This one is a pretty slippery slope, to be sure.

So yesterday I got lots of rest, a bit of exercise and some good clean eating with a large measure of protein and today I feel much better, stronger and a bit more back to normal. I didn't wake up with a food hangover or any regrets about yesterday's behaviors - what a great way to start a day.

Take good care of yourself. Be kind to others. Find your way back.



  1. I love that you don't try to "make up" by restricting food or over exercising! Just rebooting. Perfect.

    BTW, walking and pedaling? Excellent! I imagine that's what I'll be doing one day too.

  2. Very insightful. Especially liked the reframing of messages about exercising. Intuitive rather than punitive...makes sense.

  3. Happy New Year!
    I'm struggling big time too - but like you, I'm trying not to kick off any bad cycles by over-doing it straight away. Good luck with your plan, I love the sound of Intuitive Exercising!

  4. I've found that plenty of good lean protein wards off the food cooties (except for during the evening). (dammit)

    Love that Food Pusher Alley aka office kitchen. Ain't that the truth?

  5. I'm glad the punishment phase is over for you - I am almost through with instinctively going that way after a bad choice, myself. Good to see that you really CAN get beyond that way of thinking.

  6. Protein really is such a good way to reboot. I find that as well. If I make an effort to get in enough protein, the food just falls into place.

  7. "Spot on" seems to be the word of the day!
    Or words as the case may be!


We'll try this for a while.